Fashion; An Investigation.

A while ago I was at a friend’s watching a programme by the prophet Gok Wan- How to look good naked. His advice for clothing, hair and make up is... inspirational. But I soon discovered that this programme had originally aired back in January 2008. I feel like such a fool. I’ve been going around dressed FOUR YEARS out of date.

Needless to say, I spent a lot of time after this discovery educating myself about the fashion world, and I like to think that I have learned a thing or two, which I hope to pass on.

Looking at one of the more important fashion events of this year- The Oscars (it also does films)  I gained important insight into some of the do’s and don’ts in fashion for 2012, and a lot of inspiration to boot.

So here you go- just some of my observations:

Octavia Spencer (hand-beaded, ivory silk tulle Tashdi Shoji gown)

Here’s what one stylist had to say about Octavia Spencer’s outfit for the event;

“This is a perfect dress for a plus-size woman. Pulls you in to give the illusion of an hourglass shape. Wonder how many Spanx she’s wearing underneath..”
He’s totally right! No one would ever guess how hideous she really is under that dress! Way to go Octavia! We forgive you for insulting us with your body now.

Melissa McCarthy (custom gown by Marina Rinaldi) 

Here’s another one at it! What was she thinking?! Firstly she has the audacity to look like that, but secondly, unlike Octavia, she doesn’t even try to hide it. As the designer noted- “Plus size fashion is supposed to compliment, not insult! I’m offended!”
I know right? The whole idea of ‘plus-size fashion’ is that it gives you a chance to make up for your body image, if you’re not going to do that, then stop hurting our eyes.

After such profound inspiration from fashion designers and looking at some red carpet styles, I was able to make my own observations which I hope will be helpful. Here are some of my redcarpet ‘dos and don’ts’ for 2012:

Don't

Ellie Kemper blinds in this Armani Prive dress!

 Can you say sunglasses? What was she 

thinking? It’s blinding and yet I can’t look 

away. She certainly draws looks in this 

number!

Do

Ellie Kemper sparkles in this Armani Prive dress! Can you say gorgeous? It's Dazzling and eye catching, she certainly draws looks in this number!

While the fashion world remains somewhat of a mysterious iceberg to me, the tip of which I have only just hit, and with much learning and studying left to do, at least now I know that this is what people are wearing for 2012.

Memoirs From A Sixteen Year Old Me

I had just discovered the internet.

13 July 1997

We've been sailing for 5 days now, and already its beginning to set in. Roberts has been searching the open waters every day with his naked eye, but to no avail. There is a fear we will run out of food because Jenkins keeps eating it. But we daren't say a word for fear of upsetting the man, who has recently lost his dog Alfred. Maria maintains that we should be sailing north, but since none of us owns a compass, we're not sure where this is. There was a brawl tonight over supper, McGuff wanted to watch Law and Order, but there was a particular gardening show on that Harrod was keen to see. In the end Stevens brought out the second widescreen. We don't know if the weather will keep mild, but Harrod has prepared a jug of lemonade just in case.